The Gun Show

Middle child: "OK, I'm going out for the night."

Me: "Where to?"

Middle child puts up one arm and makes a fist. Points to bicep with the other hand: "To the gun show."



Oy.

We're Not Amish

So the dishwasher broke (cuz, you know, SSA paid me). I ask Gregory to do the dishes. He says, "I can't. The dishwasher is broken."

Sigh...

So I say, "Fill the sink with hot water and soap and do them by hand."

The child looks at me like I've lost my mind and says, "But we're not Amish!"

Convertibles

So I'm showing the middle child a huge necklace that converts to a tiara (cuz he's the only one who will listen).

He says, "Now that's the kind of convertible every lady should have."

He's still single gals.

Sent to Me by the Middle Child

Dearly departed husband would agree.

Personally, I prefer teaching them to pay rent.

More of My Life with Boys (and not the normal kind)

Middle child to youngest: Go wash your hands.

Youngest: Why?

Middle: Because you just went to the bathroom and I didn't hear the water running.

Youngest: But why do I have to do it every time?

Me: Because your hands are dirty every time.

Middle: Yes, you should wash your hands 35 times a day like I do.

Oldest to me: Pfft. That's a lie. You know how I know he's lying about that 35 times thing?

Me: How?

Oldest: Because it's an odd number.

On Going Out

Middle child about to go out. 

Me: You look so handsome!

Him (with eyebrow lifted): Yeah. See, I want to be the best looking one in the group but I don't want to look like I'm trying.

My Runner

Youngest disappeared for a while today. Front door unlocked, back door unlocked, no youngest boy. Geez I hate doing this alone.


Found him at one of the neighborhood parks, safe. 
Still a runner after all these years.

Boys and Toys

Off to buy the middle child a new vehicle. Proud of him for qualifying for a loan on his own.

— feeling thankful.